Some Advice?

Posted on Sat Jun 15th, 2019 @ 6:59am by

Mission: Episode 1: Hell is a four letter word
Location: Anje's cabin
3049 words - 6.1 OF Standard Post Measure

Having checked with the duty roster and the ship’s computer, Jessica had made sure Anje was in her cabin and alone. She didn’t want to disturb her during important business. She rang the doorbell and waited.

Anje had been reading a book, a biography of her late ancestor Marshall Zhukov, when her chime rang. Placing the book down, she walked to the door and opened it for Jessica Clarke, “Jessica, hi.” She greeted, standing aside to admit her friend, “Please, come in.”

Stepping inside, Jessica said, “I need your advice.” She was usually direct and to the point. “Is this a good time to ask you some personal questions?”

“Sure, sure.” Anje said, leading Jessica to the couch by the window, “Here, let’s sit down and relax. Would you like a drink or something?”

Jessica laughed. “That’s my line. But yes, surprise me.”

“Okay, so, alcohol, yes, no, maybe?” Anje asked, it was going to make the difference between authentic and replicated.

“I’m not against it”, Jessica said. “It’s not like they can call me up for emergency response duties and being inebriated makes a difference.”

“Okay, then how about a taste of the Motherland?” Anje said, pouring them both a glass of excellent Russian vodka and handing Jessica hers as she took a seat beside her, “So, what’s on your mind?”

“Your sister”, Jessica said. She took a sip, enjoying how smooth it was. “I think she’s coming on to me. I can’t figure out why. Maybe she’s into older women? But the thing is, I have no idea what I should do.”

~Hoo boy…~ “Okay, Milla is about to turn eighteen, so she’s got a lot of hormonal things going on and, no doubt, she’s developed an attachment to you after all the time you’ve spent together.” Anje began, “What makes you think she’s coming on to you though?”

“Well, she’s been asking about whether I had a boyfriend or girlfriend before”, Jessica said. “Obviously testing the waters. Which I haven’t, on either count. And she looks for ways to be physically close to me. A touch here, a hug there, kissed my hand.”

“Are you uncomfortable with this?” Anje asked.

“No, it’s not that”, Jessica said. “But she’s eighteen, well, almost, I’m thirty-three. And I haven’t even got all my parts. Don’t you think it’s weird?”

“Is this about the ear?” Anje asked, “Be honest with me.”

“That, and I haven’t had the best life, and it shows”, Jessica said. “I’ve gained a bit of weight. Estelle says I’ve got a long way to go before she would call me healthy, only thing I wouldn’t have to worry about was the standard kind of ailments that stem from having too good a life.”

“Nobody has always had the best life.” Anje reassured her, “And if that’s your main worry, it’s not as big a deal as you’re making it out to be.”

“No, my main worry is that she’s, as you say, full of hormones, and she’s focused on me for some reason, and I’m twice her age and it won’t work out and I’ll hurt her and she’ll hate me and it’ll ruin a great friendship”, Jessica said, only realising after the fact that she’d used way to many ‘ands’ in her sentence.

“Have you told her this?” Anje queried, “I mean, you don’t have to reject her, you can ask her to slow down if you think you might be interested.”

“No, I was hoping you could help me decide what to do about it”, Jessica said. “I don’t want to reject her. I don’t want to encourage her either. I just don’t want to hurt her.”

“Jess, you’ve got to be totally honest with her.” Anje said, sipping her drink, “Tell her what you’re worried about, explain it to her, and go from there.”

“And you don’t think I’m just way too old for her, or something?” Jessica wondered.

“No, not at all.” Anje shook her head, “I mean, she’s a legal adult in two days, so there’s no issue there, and she already isn’t going to let me make the decision, much less two days from now. If it was me, I would wait and discuss it after her birthday, wait until she brings it up, then say what’s on your mind.”

“I’m afraid that however it’ll go, either one or maybe both of you might end up hating me”, Jessica said.

“That, I can promise you, is not going to happen.” Anje smiled, “If you’re honest and upfront with Milla, I promise she’ll never be mad at you. Dishonesty is her pet peeve, why she hated Cheline. As for me, I’m not going to be mad at you because of whatever happens or doesn’t happen with you and my sister.” ~Really hope this isn’t one of Milla’s passing fancies, I’m going to be pissed if she hurts Jessica because she changes her mind in a month or whatever…~

“I think I can do that”, Jessica said. “Being honest, I mean. And the way I see it, she could do a lot better than me. I’m not exactly a catch.”

“See, I disagree with you there.” Anje said quickly, “I think you’re a lot more attractive than you realize and need to stop thinking negative. You’re not going to get too far in your new life with an old attitude.”

“If she were closer to my age, maybe…” Jessica sighed.

“Hey, there’s a lot to be said for younger lovers.” Anje joked, “Your vid-player won’t blink twelve hundred hours all the time for one thing.”

Jessica just looked at Anje like her wheel was turning, but the hamster was dead. “My what?”

~Smooth move, stupid…~ Anje cursed herself, realizing that Jessica had probably never seen a vid-player and definitely didn’t own one, “It’s a machine that plays videos of movies, shows, it’s for entertainment. They’re a lot of fun.”

“And what does it mean when they’re blinking twelve hundred hours?” Jessica asked. “I understand it’s some kind of metaphor but… “ She shook her head. “I’m sorry, I can’t figure it out.”

“You have to set the clocks or they blink twelve hundred hours all the time.” Anje explained, “Tell you what, when we get back to DS9, we’re going to get you your very first vid-player..”

“Wouldn’t the wall monitor in my quarters work?” Jessica wondered. “But, seriously, what’s the meaning of your metaphor?”

“It’s a stereotype about younger people being better with technical things.” Anje laughed, not sure really how to explain something that just kind of was, ~Guess Jessica hasn’t heard a lot of jokes in her life though…~

“Oh”, Jessica laughed. “Yeah, lots of modern tech around, nothing my garden shed subspace transceiver can compare to, no matter how much Milla tries to tell me it’s amazing.”

“I don’t think it’s the device itself she finds amazing so much as its origins.” Anje stated, she knew she felt that way, “It’s like, the device was good, but the way you managed to make it was what was amazing. We’re all impressed by your ingenuity.”

“And you’re not just saying that to be nice?” Jessica asked.

“Not at all.” Anje shook her head, “The fact is you did something not a lot of us could do, you deserve to be a little impressed with yourself over it.”

“So you think, maybe, if I want to take up engineering training, I wouldn’t be reaching?” Jessica asked. “I was thinking, maybe I could reach crewman level, become a maintenance engineer, maybe in cargo handling.”

“That’s not out of hand, no.” Anje encouraged, “Though I’d shoot for more. I mean, never settle. Reach that goal, then set a new one, ad infinitum.”

“What’s wrong with settling once you’re happy with what you’ve got?” Jessica asked.

“Because the human spirit seeks growth.” Anje explained, “Think of it like a plant, would it not be logical to let a plant grow to its maximum potential rather than starve it out when it reaches a certain level? Why limit your potential?”

“No, with some plants you have to harvest them before they are fully grown, otherwise they’re no good to eat”, Jessica said. “Only a few need to grow further, so you can have seeds for next year. It’s complicated.”

“Okay, okay, bad analogy.” Anje conceded, picking plants for an analogy with a farmer was a flawed strategy at best, “Not a plant, a flower, like a rose, think of it that way.”

“Yes, you have to cut off the old blossoms so it’ll make new ones”, Jessica explained. “Otherwise, it’ll only be in bloom for a week or two.” She pointed to the side of her head missing an ear. “I’ve been cut back enough, I think.”

“Okay, well, that’s only temporary now.” Anje smiled, “But, yes, now you’ve got it, you find new blossoms by reaching for new goals.”

“Maybe. But I’m a simple woman”, Jessica said. “I don’t need much for happiness.”

“Just give yourself room to grow.” Anje said warmly, “At the end of the day you’ll be surprised by how much you can surprise yourself.”

“I’ve grown a lot since I came here”, Jessica said. “So I know you’re right. I’ll have to stop somewhere, though. If I don’t, I’ll need new clothes.”

Anje snickered at Jessica’s joke, “You’ve got plenty of room to spare, don’t worry.” She reassured, “And new clothes will become necessary before too long anyway. New clothes, new place, new opportunities.”

“And navigating the minefield of teenage emotions”, Jessica reminded herself.

“Just be honest and it won’t even be an issue.” Anje reminded, “As long as you’re honest, Milla will respect anything you say.”

“That doesn’t make it any less of a minefield”, Jessica said. “I don’t want any bad blood if things don’t work out. Or any appearance of impropriety that might damage the cause.”

“Jessica, can I give you some advice my Aunt once gave me?” Anje asked, waiting for an answer before proceeding; if there was one thing she knew, it was that nobody liked unsolicited advice.

“Uhm, yes, certainly”, Jessica said, wondering why Anje would ask, considering she’d come here specifically to get advice.

“Don’t overthink.” Anje said plainly, it had been a very hard lesson for her to learn but worthwhile, “If you overthink things, think about everything that can go wrong, you’ll never be able to make a decision and you’ll only make yourself suffer for it.”

“It’s not as easy as in your case, I’m afraid”, Jessica said. “You’re having an amazing, hot affair, but you needn’t worry about the long haul.”

That stopped Anje dead. She knew Jessica hadn’t meant to, but that had cut deep. She had been enjoying the moment so much, enjoying feeling like herself again, that she hadn’t really thought about the fact that Merella would, most likely, be leaving at the end of this trip, going back to Trill. The thought made her hurt, but she hid it, “It’s not so different.” She continued, “You still can’t cripple yourself with doubts.”

Jessica nodded. “I’d rather play it safe, but you’re right. I’ll just talk to her about it and she’ll be all reasonable and we’ll be much happier after, no?” Not that she believed this to be true.

“I think so.” Anje nodded. She knew her sister very well, nothing made her angrier than dishonesty and she could never be mad at anyone for telling her the truth, “Like I said, wait until after her birthday, then wait for her to bring it up. As long as you’re honest, you’ll be fine. My aunt is the nutty one, not Milla.”

“You’re saying I shouldn’t just ask her about it?” Jessica wondered. “I suppose not. I might be reading her all wrong and make a fool of myself.”

“I don’t know if you are or not.” Anje said, “But it can never hurt to keep from making a fool of yourself, I suppose.”

Jessica laughed. “That is the kind of advice you’ll never regret giving. Sadly, it’s also a no-brainer and nobody appears wise saying it”, she teased.

“Yet, somehow, so many people need reminding.” Anje shook her head, “Boggles the mind.”

“Oh, so you’ve had your share of interactions with the inspectors?” Jessica wondered.

“Them, too.” Anje rolled her eyes, that Albright in particular….

“What have they done to you?” Jessica asked. Not that she was after gossip.

“Fortunately after I got them the hell out of ops, I’ve had little interaction with them.” Anje replied, “None at all with Lovejoy, and only once more with Albright. That’s a serious misnomer, by the way.” She wasn’t sure Percival Albright could tie his own shoes without help.

“That, I’ve noticed, happens a lot on this boat”, Jessica smirked. “Estelle, for example. Did you know she has a sister called Fanny?”

“Gallia told me.” Anje giggled, “Poor kid, Fanny Hertz…”

“At least she’s not in the business of making discoveries”, Jessica laughed.

“Right?” Anje laughed harder, “Poor kid would never be taken seriously. Like if Einstein had had a southern accent. The minute he started talking about relativity people’s minds would’ve gone a whole other way.”

Jessica laughed together with Anje, though it was more because of the current mood. Anje’s joke had gone right over her head. “Lucky her older sister is a doctor, so she can get discrete prescriptions.”

“Right???” Anje replied, now laughing so hard she was struggling to breath.

“I am certain they didn’t have an easy childhood either”, Jessica concluded.

“Probably not.” Anje agreed, she could certainly relate; growing up a century out of place had made school hard for her, she often felt like the main attraction at a freak show, “But, there are those who’ve had it a lot worse. Just reminds you to be grateful, I guess.”

“I guess that’s my function in life, reminding people”, Jessica said. “It works at the bar, whatever it is people complain about. They see me, consider their situation and usually realise it’s not quite as bad as they thought.”

“I can definitely understand that.” Anje nodded, having done the same thing several times herself. She turned back to the original topic, sort of, “So, feeling better now?”

“Yes, less worried”, Jessica smiled. Her greatest worry had been complications in her friendship with Anje, which might have been bad no matter what came to pass between her and Milla.

“I’m glad I could help.” Anje smiled, comfortingly rubbing Jessica’s shoulder, “And I appreciate that you trusted me with this.”

“Who else, if not you?” Jessica asked.

“Maybe that’s so.” Anje shrugged, “But it’s still an honor.”

Jessica leaned in and kissed Anje’s cheek. “You’ve been nothing but good to me. I just hope that I’ll be able to return a few favours some day.”

Anje returned the kiss, but explained, “You got Milla and I talking again, this is just my way of paying a small part of my debt to you.”

“Oh, was that my doing? That’s nice to know”, Jessica smiled. That did something for her self-esteem.

“And neither of us can ever thank you enough.” Anje replied warmly, adding, “You’ll always be welcome here, no matter what happens. You’re one of our own now, Jessica, that’s something that nobody can take away from you.”

“Let’s hope so”, Jessica said. “I’ve learnt that there is no permanent happiness. Everything ends, we can only hope to make the most of the time we have.”

“Of course there’s no permanent happiness.” Anje shrugged it off, “Because there are no permanent people. We’re born, we live, we die, we vanish into the energy of the void. But nothing there means you can’t be happy for the rest of your life. You’ve just got to work at it and believe, that’s all.”

“I fully intend to do that”, Jessica agreed with a smile.

“Sounds like you’ve got big plans for your future.” Anje smiled back, “I’m glad.”

“Not really, no”, Jessica said. “At least, not for my personal life. I am happy with very little, and have already got more than I need. Everything else is just a bonus.”

“Then keep racking up bonuses.” Anje advised, “But don’t let them become necessities.”

Jessica shook her head. “No, those of us who’ve gone through tough times know the difference. I’ve met a few people here who understand, and I feel you’re one of them. It helps. Being understood, I mean.”

“And that’s one of the most valuable things in human existence.” Anje nodded in agreement, “Being understood. That is a necessity.”

“And I’ll talk to Milla tomorrow”, Jessica said. “Maybe it’s nothing and I’ll make a fool of myself, maybe not. But you’re right, wasting time beating about the bush isn’t going to help.” She hugged Anje. “Thank you. Oh, and, please don’t tell her we talked about this?”

“You were never here.” Anje joked, gently rubbing Jessica’s back during the hug, the new less starved Jessica was a beauty, she understood what Milla liked.

“Thank you again.” She released Anje from her embrace and waved on her way out. “Good night, Anje.”

“Good night.” Anje replied, turning back to her drink and her book.