What About Us?
Posted on Thu Aug 15th, 2019 @ 7:05am by
Mission:
Mission 2: Heaven On Earth
Location: DS9 - Guest Quarters
Timeline: After Elysium returns to Earth
956 words - 1.9 OF Standard Post Measure
Anje stood in front of Merella's door and rang the chime, waiting for her girlfriend to come and let her in. Her mind was filled with questions, the most mentally taxing of which was whether or not Merella was going to be sticking around or if they really were two ships passing in the night, ~Here's hoping.~ She thought, standing there waiting with roses, and her heart, in her hand.
The doors parted to reveal Merella Swii, smiling as she prepared to greet her guest. But when her eyes settled on Anje the smile quickly faded. "Anje," she said softly. They fell lower, to the flowers. "What...what's going on?"
"I brought these for you." Anje replied, then read her lover's expression, "You were expecting someone else..."
"Anje," Merella began softly. "I -- We should talk. Do you want to come in? I could offer you a drink maybe?"
Anje came in and closed the door behind her, not about to let the rest of the corridor see this, "So, I guess this is a dumping then..." ~If I get dumped one more time I can legally reclassify myself as diarrhea.~
Merella reached out to Anje even as she began to speak. But the hand fell. "I don't want this to end," she said. "But I don't know how it can possibly continue. Not with 'her' serving on the same ship as you."
"Her?" Anje wondered aloud, figuring it meant one of the sisters, just unsure if it was Liselle or Milla she couldn't be here with.
"She's my sister, and I do care about her. On some level. But there is no way I can live with her. An entire planet wasn't big enough to give us the space we needed from each other. A single starship would be so much worse," she said. Merella levelled a look at Anje. "And besides, I don't think your sister is my biggest fan, either."
"Well, Milla's not the boss of me." Anje began, though it had started to sink in that the issue was with Liselle, not Milla, "And I guess asking you to try for my sake is probably too much, huh?" She already knew the answer, this wasn't going to end well...
"I want to. I would," Merella said earnestly. Her chest rose. "I don't suppose you would consider coming back to Trill with me? Take an extended break from all of this?"
"How I wish I could." Anje sighed, the idea of running away with Merella and never looking back was the most tempting thing she'd ever faced, "I want to leave with you, resign my commission and start a new life, but the thing is... I don't know what in the Hell I would do if I wasn't a Starfleet officer. I mean, since I was four, I knew this is what I wanted to be. I.. I never thought of what else I would do with myself."
Merella's eyes fell. "So that's where we are," she said. "Both of us knowing what we want, but not willing to sacrifice what's necessary to have it."
"Tantalus' apple in the underworld." Anje remarked, thinking back on a picture she remembered from a storybook when she was young. There seemed to be something else though, "You knew I wouldn't quit, you expected that. So, question is this, is it him?"
"Him?"
"Your ex, Magnum P.U.." Anje stated rather than asking, remembering why she'd never liked Taam Sor'el, "There's still something there, isn't there?"
Merella looked down at her hands, surprised to see that she had twined her fingers together. "Things are...very confusing for me right now. Taam and I have a lot of history together, most of it not good. I thought that I had put that chapter of my life behind me. But when I heard that he had been kidnapped along with Liselle and the rest of your crew..."
"I still think he's a real jerk..." Anje sighed, her voice just a little salty, "But, I want you to be happy, Merella, because you deserve it, even if it's not with me."
The Trill took a step forward and held out both of her hands to her. "You really are incredible. Do you know that?"
"Thanks." Anje replied, hiding the tears that were about to come, "You deserved no less." ~Maybe one day being incredible will be worth something to someone.~
"Despite how this all turned out, I'm happy I met you. Very happy," she said with a sad smile. "I will never forget you, Anje. Or what we've shared."
"You know, Milla can still go live in the cadet quarters?" Anje offered, "I mean, if you wanted to stay."
She smiled warmly at that. She felt tears welling up in her eyes, and she blinked them away in utter shock. Before Anje she couldn't remember the last time she had cried. Now, she had lost count of how many times it had happened. Stay with her. Start a new, happy life. It was a tempting offer. But...
Merella wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. "Good bye, Anje," she managed. "If you ever find yourself on Trill someday..."
"I'll stop in and say hi to you and, hopefully, the kids." Anje replied, she really did wish Merella the best, "I love you..."
Merella wanted to say it, too. But she couldn't. She knew that if she tried, the tears would overtake her entirely. And she simply refused to allow herself to succumb to such an unworthy display. Instead, she pulled Anje to her and she kissed her. The kiss was like the first kiss. And it was if it would be the last kiss they would ever have.