Back to duty

Posted on Sat Feb 26th, 2022 @ 6:36am by Lieutenant Colonel Azhul Naxea & Captain Natacha Patani

Mission: MISSION 0 - History Speaks
Location: Captain Patani's Quarters
Timeline: Set after "For Whom the bell Tolls"
1345 words - 2.7 OF Standard Post Measure

The day after having spoken with Myne, Naxea stood in front of her XO's Quarters. She wanted to speak with the younger woman now that she had all the details of what transpired from Lieutenant Redal. She pressed the door chime as she waited for her Xo to answer.

Natacha was in loose clothing, performing Virabhadrasana Vinyasa yoga, when the chime to her quarters sounded. Natacha centered herself and took a deep breath before responding "Enter."

Entering, Naxea spotted her XO standing in the center of her quarters. "What were you doing?" she asked, curious and as a way of starting conversation with the woman.

"Yoga," Natacha answered. "I do this particular flow daily. It helps my body compensate for the lower gravity of the Elysium. Lower than what I grew up with," Natacha amended. "Won't you have a seat, Colonel?" Natacha added, gesturing to the sole chair in the room, the one by her desk.

Outside of four weapons on the wall (the first pair consisted of sword hilts with eight very long, thin flexible steel blades attached to each, and the second pair were straight blades attached to a steel sphere and cylinder), the room was as empty as when Natacha had moved in. On top of the desk were a few PADDs, some actual books, and six snow globes. All but one of the snow globes were spherical, the remaining one being cubical. Inside of each globe there was a large reptilian scale, suspended in the center. The scales in the round globe changed from silver to gold and back to silver again, depending on how the light struck them. The one in the square snow globe was a sickly green.

Naxea stepped further into the room, taking the offered seat as she took in her surroundings. The snow globes caught her eye as she felt it was an odd thing for a person to collect--to her at least. "Captain Patani, I'm here about what occurred earlier with you. I know about Lieutenant Redal and spoke with her about her actions."

Natacha took a seat on her bunk but otherwise made no other response, the features on her face remaining stoic.

Naxea let out a sigh as she shifted her weight in the chair, "Well, now that I have a better understanding about what happened from Lieutenant Redal and why it happened in the first place, you are no longer confined to your quarters. I think I can understand why you thought you were protecting Lieutenant Redal and I do find that admirable--even if you did refuse a direct order from myself to reveal who had bypassed the security grid, which I take very seriously after our last encounter with the Mirror Universe Elysium, where over fifty percent of the Detachment was killed--over fifty Marines and I owe them to ensure nothing like that ever happens again."

"Which is why I resigned my commission, Colonel," Natacha replied, remembering when she had handed her railroad tracks and the SFMC equivalent of the Globe and Anchor to Naxea. "I have always put the needs of my sisters and brothers in the Corps above all else. Always. The Corps has been my rock and I have never regretted giving it my loyalty. Lieutenant Redal, though..."

Natacha sighed before she continued. "Things like maternal instincts are---well, were, were not encouraged on my home world. For all I know, I might have provided half the genetic material for a dozen children. Perhaps more. It's not a question you're supposed to ask. Lieutenant Redal...well, she's more than a little strange, even compared with someone like me. And she doesn't have a place on this vessel like I do. Or did. Her situation invoked that maternal instinct I didn't know existed in me. An instinct which interferes with my duty to the Corps. I can't explain it any better than that, Colonel."

"Well," Naxea began., looking at the woman. "Your resignation first has to be accepted by myself before passed onto the Commandant at SFMC HQ. I've done no such thing as of yet. I am familiar with how Lieutenant Redal grew up. My experiences during the Cardassian Occupation are similar to what she went through. And as such, she needs a friend like you and I don't see your maternal instincts coming in between you and your commitment to the Detachment. Marines fight to protect those they care for, and your maternal instinct aids that commitment. As you are still new, I suggest you learn to trust me. I can be tough but you will find that I am a fair commander."

Natacha maintained a stoic countenance while she listened to her commanding officer. "Colonel, I have no doubt in either your toughness or your fairness. It is my own virtues, or lack thereof, that I have doubts in." Natacha paused, and there might have been the hint of emotion in her eyes. "I love the Corps, ma'am. It's the one thing in my life that makes sense. I can't and won't let it down again."

Sitting back in the chair she was in, Naxea paused for a moment as she looked at the woman. "And how exactly do you believe you are benefiting the detachment and the Corps by wallowing in self pity? Whether you believe it or not, you are needed here. Do you think you're the first Marine to have made a mistake? Learn from it and move on--it's how we grow and get better."

There was a thoughtful look on her face as Natacha processed everything the Colonel had said. "It's not just making a mistake, Colonel. I don't like making mistakes, but I do learn from them. As Nietzsche once said, Aus der Kriegsschule des Lebens.—Was mich nicht umbringt, macht mich stärker. Out of life’s school of war—what doesn’t kill me, makes me stronger." Natacha paused before adding. "But what I did feels worse than a mistake. The Roman historian Plutarch once wrote that the mother's of Spartan warriors instructed them to either return with their shields or on them. I feel as if I have discarded my shield."

A determined countenance settled on Natacha's face as she stood up. "I would like to think and meditate on this some more, Colonel. But for now, I would appreciate the opportunity to return to duty." Natacha hesitated before adding, "For now, I am going to set aside those aspects of my private life that interfere on my focus on the Corps, Colonel."

Naxea nodded and grinned. "Understood," she said as she stood up but paused. "But I would suggest that you do not forsake Lieutenant Redal. With her background, she can use all the friends she can get. I know from experience, and she really wants to be friends with you." Normally Naxea wasn't one for suggesting people who or who not to be friends with but Redal's past brought back memories and feelings of being afraid and lonely that she had had after the Cardassian Occupation ended.

"Understood, Colonel. But as I said, I need to consider everything you've said." Natacha still wasn't convinced she shouldn't resign her commission. But it looked as if she was going to do so, she'd have to wait until the Elysium reached SB351. "And I appreciate your suggestion, but for now, I want to focus solely on the Corps."

"Very well, then. Report for duty tomorrow at 0600," Naxea replied as she turned and walked out Natacha's Quarters.

Natacha gave her commanding officer a curt nod before the Colonel made her exit. The Marine Captain was about to return to her yoga, then paused. Instead, she sat at her desk, picked up the single square snow globe, and pondered its content. The Colonel may have thought the situation had been resolved, but in Natacha's mind, it had merely been postponed until the Elysium reached SB351.

"Cum clypeo tuo aut in eo," Natacha muttered to herself. Natacha set the snow globe back in its place before returning to her flow routine.