Don't eat that!

Posted on Thu Jun 27th, 2019 @ 5:40am by Lieutenant Commander S'hib
Edited on on Thu Jun 27th, 2019 @ 8:34am

Mission: Episode 1: Hell is a four letter word
Location: Arboretum
Timeline: After A very Ordinary afternoon Pt 2
2292 words - 4.6 OF Standard Post Measure

Walking into the Elysium's vast arboretum, S'hib felt the smell of genuine planetside air fill his lungs, the earthy tones and slightly moist air calming him immensely as he looked up at the nearest cluster of thick vegetation and trees.

~I wonder how they control all the different invasive species fighting one another." He wondered, noticing several plants in close proximity that would never have thrived together in the wild.

"I should have asked where exactly I was meeting her." S'hib snorted under his own breath as he suddenly looked down the winding paths of the arboretum, dozens of crewmen and civilians alike enjoying the carefully cultivated flora. "Well, I'm not exactly hard to miss." He reasoned with himself as he took off down the cobbled footpath, hooves clicking underneath, hoping she would spot him.

Mona sat in her favourite spot, at the base of a tall tree near the far wall, with all of the Arboretum in front of her, and just the wall behind. Not many people came this way, mostly because there were bushes planted in front to conceal more of the wall. She could look out through the bushes, but looking in from the footpath was a little harder, especially since she was as green as the vegetation. She heard him come closer from a distance, wondering he'd find her? Either his instincts or his security training, she figured, would lead him to her.

Coming to a stop S'hib turned around, unaware he was now looking at every part of the Arboretum that didn't contain Mona. ~She must be hiding.~ S'hib summarised as he slowly looked around, his muzzle panning from left to right with the occasional flick of an ear.

"Either that or I'm blind." He added under his own breath as his tail flicked against the bushes behind him.

After a few more moments of silence his head snapped back to the middle, tilting slightly to the side as both his ears twisted to face behind him. "First you beat me up, And now you're hiding from me." S'hib snorted, a slight tease to his voice as he turned around and moved some foliage aside.

"I'm not hiding, I always sit here", Mona grinned. "I was getting ready to throw this little pine cone at you, though."

"You know if you throw that at me I'll have to come in there and confiscate the rest." S'hib said as he leaned his head further past the bush to where Mona was sitting.

"Just don't eat all those leaves, I like to have them aid in my concealment", Mona said. She was always watching people, as well as the animals that populated the arboretum, from her spot down by the tree, or sitting up on one of its branches, and few people knew she was ever there.

Without saying anything and still staring at Mona, S'hib slowly opened his mouth and started edging closer to a small cluster of leaves.

Mona's pinecone landed right on his nose, which she figured was freshly fixed and thus safe. "Don't even think about it!"

"Ow!" S'hib yelped before laughing. "That's it, I'm coming in!" He added as he started moving through the thick foliage, struggling until he was on the other side.

"I take it you come here a lot?" He snorted, sitting down with as much grace as an earth horse, Loose twigs and leaves sticking to his fur and mane.

"It's my favourite place, if I'm not in my quarters", Mona said. "Not as much green in my quarters, but I have a coral reef instead."

"I've only just moved my belongings to my quarters," S'hib said as he pulled a small stick out of his mane, flicking it back into the foliage that hid them both. "I've only got a dozen plants so far, but hopefully I'll be able to grow more around my room soon."

"In case your replicator gives out and you'll have to survive on what you've got around you?" Mona teased.

"I have to prune them somehow." S'hib quipped back, sticking his large flat tongue out at Mona. "Besides I can always snack here." He teased back, reaching slowly towards another bush with a big grin on his muzzle.

"Hay!" Mona said, pointing at some dry grass.

"I'm not eating that, You've been sitting on it." S'hib said very sternly while trying to keep a straight face and not laugh.

"I'll have you know, my bum is cleaner than many other places on this ship, those bushes included", Mona said. "Why, just last night, I caught a guy wanting to pee in these very bushes."

Staring at her for a moment S'hib simply reached over and broke off a small leaf from a nearby plant, promptly placing it in his mouth in defiance. "Hey if that's what you're into I'm not judging." He snorted as he started to chew, grinning as he did so.

"I'm going to set up a low-voltage fence inside the bushes", Mona said. "Just enough to persuade them to use a different toilet."

"Somehow I don't think the groundkeepers will allow that." S'hib replied as he slyly scooped up a small pinecone behind him. "You could always just throw more of these?" He said gently under arming it at her.

"But I'm not always here", Mona said. "I've got to protect my bushes at night." She caught the pine cone. "Or maybe if I put a small camera in here... shame the perpetrators?"

"You know you sound like a security risk, right?" S'hib said mockingly "I might have to escort you out if you can't play nice and share your tree." He added while nonchalantly admiring a large flower that he was holding between his fingers.

"I don't want to sit in a puddle of piss!" Mona complained. "Can you blame me?"

"Maybe that's why the grass is dead." S'hib snorted teasingly, pointing back at the dry and browning grass Mona said he eat earlier.

"No, that's just the season. Once the seeds are dispersed, it turns that colour", Mona said.

"So why this spot, what's so special about it..." S'hib said curiously as he looked at his tail, it had been flicking across the floor and had acquired an assortment of flora and dirt. "Oh for, fuck sake." He snorted out suddenly, grabbing his tail and pulling it up onto his lap.

Mona giggled. "It's got the best view. Ducks on the pond, birds in the bushes, and there's a squirrel that keeps bringing me nuts." She opened the little hideout, pulled out a walnut, cracked and ate it.

"You know if I hadn't bled over half the ship I would never have guessed you're marine." S'hib said as he gently pulled out dried leaves and flakes of dirt from his long flowing tail, stopping only to look back up at Mona. "It was worth it though." He added before looking back down and grooming his tail once more.

"You like getting bloodied?" Mona wondered. "But I agree. Besides, Fernando was so kind as to treat my bruises with a special massage oil, it was all better in the morning."

“No, I just happened to enjoy your company up until your fist hit my face.” S’hib said, flicking his muzzle up into the air.

"Anyone who goes into security, or the marines for that matter, must be a glutton for punishment in one form or another", Mona grinned. "So that must include you."

Staying silent for a moment S’hib looked down and starred at Mona, snorting a lungful of air out before lifting his hands up in surrender “You got me... I was laying there in sickbay, blood down my chest.” He added moving a paw to his muzzle, moving it gently over his neatly trimmed fur.

"And all I could think about, was how soft your hands are." S’hib said mockingly, a slight grin creeping up on his face. “Must be all that special oil you mentioned.” he added before leaning back on his hooved hands.

"Likely story, considering I've only mentioned it just now", Mona said, calling him out. "But maybe I should specialise in beating up security personnel?"

"I dunno about that, you got pretty squeamish once there was blood." S'hib said, snorting out a laugh.

"Because I didn't really want to hurt you", Mona said. "Just learn how to beat you, or someone like you. Besides, blood stinks, I don't like having it on me if I have a say about it."

"I will admit, I'm not as efficient at unarmed combat as I would like..." He said, scrunching his brow up. "It is unfortunate I can not carry my Sh'akubo with me while on duty." S'hib added, wondering if he could file a request.

"And I might understand why if you told me what it is?" Mona asked.

"It's what I imagine you would call a staff. They're not bladed but the blunt force is usually enough to persuade anyone from coming close." S'hib said as he sat up slightly and extended his arms out either side. "It's about this long when extended." He added, moving his hands closer until they came within a foot of each other. "But when I carry it on my belt, it's like this."

"Ah, yes, I've seen those", Mona smiled. "A Denn'bok, is what I know it as. Very useful, especially for security. Coat the ends in rubber, you can use it for crowd policing, too."

"In combination with kicks." S'hib said as he wriggled his large hooves into the dirt. "The fighting style is very effective." He added, running his hands through his mane. "Still, doesn't stop a phaser from hitting you in the back." He quipped, finding the irony of hand to hand combat in an age where a single phaser could incapacitate a corridor of people with the click of a button.

"Which is why I fight as a sharpshooter when I can", Mona said. "The best fight is one that ends before your opponent realises it's started."

"Keeps you away from the blood as well." S'hib smirked, looking up at the tree Mona was near. "Your friend's back." He snorted lightly, nodding up at the tree as a squirrel looked down at them both inquisitively.

"Probably waiting for us to move on so it can deposit more nuts", Mona said. "I can't take one now, or it'll start using a different hideout."

"It must get awfully confused with you eating its stash for a winter that will never come." S'hib laughed, eyeing the small creature curiously.

"Shows what you know", Mona teased. "We've all had a great time sleighing down that hill over there, and ice-scating on the pond, a few months ago."

"I haven't even been here a week." S'hib snorted in protest, crossing his arms and frowning.

"Humans have some weird customs for a winter festival, it goes back to some of their mythologies", Mona said. "So when the time came, this entire place was turned into a winter wonderland. It was fun, though many of the rituals completely escape my understanding."

"First time I saw snow was on Earth." S'hib said thinking back to his foalhood. "My hooves didn't enjoy the ice being everywhere." He added with a small amount of malice coming through his voice

"You need to put spikes under your shoes", Mona suggested. "But yes, it was odd for me, too. We didn't get snow on Risa, except for high up in the mountains, and I usually went camping where it was warmer than that."

"Living in the wilderness is something I miss, Earth was very different to Sequella." He said as he picked the head off a small flower. "But the food is all the same." S'hib said before tossing the bright blue ball of petals into his mouth.

"Earth is so urbanised, I'm surprised you even found any food there", Mona said.

"I was banned from the academy gardens within the first month." S'hib replied, a small smile across his lips.

"I wonder why", Mona shook her head. "So, you're an officer then?"

"Hardly, I'm only an Ensign." S'hib scoffed, Snorting as he glanced out the bushes at the people walking.

"Well, I'm a corporal - which suits me fine, it means fewer responsibilities and more of the fun stuff", Mona said.

"Like beating up Ensigns?" S'hib said, flicking his muzzle back around to face Mona.

"For example", Mona said, offering her sweetest of smiles.

S'hib simply narrowed his eyes at her in response, Snorting slightly as he moved onto his hands and knees. "I'll show you an example." He said as he moved slowly towards her.

"No fighting in the arboretum", Mona said. "We might damage the plants. It's in the rules."

"I'm coming to steal a nut actually." S'hib said as he got closer, his tail flicking behind him like it had a mind of its own.

"Oh, that's okay", Mona smirked. "There's nuts around enough for everybody on this ship."

"Somehow I feel you've been eating them all." He snorted, leaning over her slightly as he reached to where he thought Mona found the walnut before.

Mona leaned back to give him space. "Kara Hoffman and Liorga have been eating the nuttiest. I don't even come close."

"I don't believe you." He said, pointing the nut he retrieved at her. "Nut one bit." He said with a stupid grin before moving back and laying on the floor.

"Oh, you will, once you meet who exactly it is they've been eating", Mona giggled.

S'hib fell silent for a moment as he stared off into the canopy above, his jaw slowly chewing the nut as he thought about why she was giggling.