Tanks for the Help

Posted on Wed Dec 26th, 2018 @ 8:37am by Lieutenant JG Gallia Norris & Senior Chief Petty Officer Fernando De La Rosa [Taylor]

Mission: Season 2: Episode 3: Determination is not always a good thing
Location: Holodeck
Timeline: en route
3539 words - 7.1 OF Standard Post Measure

"Okay." Anje began, "The main problem you're having is with programs bleeding over into each other, right?"

"Right." Gallia nodded, "I mean, we got tank missions running into one another, we got Michael Jackson showin' up at the bloody zompoc, we got all sortsa crap goin' wrong, but it's all from the same base issue."

"All right." Anje said, letting her hair down out of the bun and flipping it from side to side, "That's an easy enough fix. Just got to restore the walls between the programs, probably went down when you transferred them here from your last assignment."

"Can ya fix it, Leftenant?" Gallia asked, hoping the shorter woman could since she so far had had no success.

"Actually, for now call me Anje. When I'm in this..." She began, directing Gallia's attention to a T-34/85 that just shimmered into existence, "it's Captain. Leader of a badass Soviet tank company."

"A T-34, nice choice." Gallia smiled, "Didnae know ya where a treadhead, Anje."

"I am." Anje smiled, "especially the Russian ones. Just been waiting for a chance to play." She hammered away on a few keys for a few minutes before lifting her head and saying, "There, fixed!"

"If I'd known it was that easy, I could have become an engineer myself", Anya said as she walked in, seeing only the last few seconds of repair action. "Oh, who's the pretty new girl?"

Anje blushed ferociously, knowing that the gorgeous woman who just walked in had to be talking about her, "Hi, Anje Brett." She introduced herself, "I just came on as Chief Operations Officer. Nice to meet you."

"Oh, uh, hi." Anya didn't expect a senior officer. "Anya Neeze. My name, not a request, that is. I only say that when I arrest people."

"Oh, wow..." Anje giggled, "Everywhere I go there's at least one other Anje. That way I'm never alone."

"Ops Anje has fixed our holoprogram." Gallia said happily.

"That means we can take the Lady A out for another spin, right?" Sami Justice asked as she entered, placing her hand on the small of Anya's back.

"That it does." Gallia smiled, "And, we've got ourselves some back-up now, too!" She pointed to the T-34, "And it's a nice one."

"Right?" Sami gasped, the tank seemed so sleek and fast, "Probably won't kick as much ass as the Lady A though." She turned to face the new woman, "We've got a seventeen pounder. I load her." She flexed her biceps at that, not sure if she wanted to arouse or intimidate.

"Well, I'm Anje, and those are beautiful." The Russian replied, indicating Sami's well built biceps, "I could spend the rest of my life in the gym and never get results like that."

"I could teach you some techniques to compensate, if you're interested", Mona offered as she walked in. "So, which of these guns was I invited to come play with?" the green woman inquired.

"Hi, glad you could make it!" Anje smiled, walking over to hug Mona, figuring it was okay there. She pointed to her tank, "We've got a tank, we've got a commander, we need a crew. Wanna drive this bad boy for me?"

"Are you sure? I mean, yes", Mona grinned. She wasn't as surprised by the hug as most others would have been, or uneasy. Orion heritage. "Show me how?"

"It's fairly easy, actually." Anje replied, giving Mona a basic rundown of how to drive the T-34, "You'll also be operating the hull mounted machine gun, that's lots of fun."

"Poke people full of holes?" Mona asked. "How wonderfully barbaric."

"We've got a fifty up top." Sami bragged.

"That's like a half-inch machine gun, isn't it?" Anya asked.

"I do envy that fifty..." Anje shrugged, tapping her commbadge, =A=Petty Officer de la Rosa, can you join me in Holodeck Four, please?=A= She turned back to Mona, "We need our gunner, after all."

"Oh, the famous Fernando? This should be fun", Mona grinned.

Fernando was in his quarters, dancing, singing just entertaining himself, when Anje called him. He stopped everything and replied instantly =^= Certainly Anje, I'm on my way.=^=

A few moments later Fernando walked in saw the assembled women, his eyes settling on Anje for an instant until they were drawn to the T-34/85 tank in front of him. His eyes glazed over and got a far away look as he gazed at the tank. "Oh mamacita." He whispered.

"And I think our tank just found herself a name." Anje giggled. Sure, giving a Soviet tank a Spanish name seemed illogical on the surface, but the name fit her, "Thanks for coming, Fernando. Thought I'd see if you wanted to man that big eighty five millimeter gun on the front of that bad girl."

"I'm sure he'd love to handle a big gun", Mona teased. "Wouldn't you, dear?"

Fernando looked at Anje and Mona, "Your welcome Anje." As his eyes drifted back to the tank. "Really?" He questioned his face taking on the look of a kid given the key to the candy store. "You bet I would!"

"Looks like we've got a crew." Anje smiled to Gallia, "So, you ready to go Tiger hunting?"

"Soon as my Gunner arrives." Gallia replied, smiling as the holodeck door whooshed open and revealed Liorga stepping inside, "And there she is!"

"Right." Liorga nodded, zipping up her jumpsuit, "But, change of plans, this time I'm going to drive and we're going to let Ms. Neeze man the big gun."

"Wasn't my fault our track got shot off the last time!" Anya complained. Though, in truth, she felt more competent with a gun anyway. And hitting that big tree had been her fault, but she wasn't going to admit that. "Let's see if you'll do any better, Liorga."

"Thought you wanted the gun?" Liorga questioned, wondering if she'd recalled their last conversation incorrectly.

"Of course I do", Anya grinned. "Shootout with Fernando, only bigger guns than usual. Are they about equal in accuracy?"

"Pretty much." Gallia nodded, "Though the difference in accuracy is mainly in the gunner's talents."

"We got this one." Sami boasted, confident in Anya's skills with the big gun.

Fernando just smiled and kept silent (an exceedingly hard task for him) however he was confident in his talent. He would let the results speak for themselves.

"I dunno about all that." Anje shook her head, "I think the pretty brown guy might have her beat."

"I'm sorry, I couldnae heard that right." Gallia laughed, "Musta had somethin' crazy stuck in my ear."

Fernando shot Anje a grateful look of appreciation. He was glad he had someone on his side. The others would soon see for themselves.

"Only one way to find out." Anje shrugged, "And that's by taking out some Panzers."

"Now, that is true for sure." Gallia nodded, "We'll settle this by killin' tanks."


Fernando had walked over to the tank, running his hand along the 85mm gun. He whispered to it. "We will show them all. You and I will be the top tank killers. I have no doubt."

"That's the spirit." Anje said, placing her hand on Fernando's shoulder, even though it meant reaching way up, "Sorry, these ears pick up so much...."


Fernando turned to face her, "There is no need to apologize Anje. I appreciate the confidence you have in me. I will not let you down." He assured her.

"I know you won't." Anje reassured him, "I never thought you would, or even could."

Fernando grinned, "Quite right. Well said Anje."

"All right, so let's mount up and roll out then!" Gallia laughed as she ascended the hull of her beloved Lady Aberdeen, "Let's go give 'em Hell!"

"That we will. Just. One. Second. There!" Anje said gleefully as the word 'Mamacita', complete with a painting of a beautiful Spanish woman, appeared on the hull of the T-34, "Now, that's a beauty right there, no?"

"Needs more green", Mona suggested.

"Okay, I can see what you're thinking." Anje nodded, punching in a few more commands and turning 'Mamacita' into an Orion, a slightly different shade of green than the olive of the tank, "Better?"

"Perfect", Mona agreed. She walked over to the front of the tank and opened the big hatch which she assumed the driver should be using, then climbed in backwards. "Good thing these were built for men", she remarked.

"Right? A little extra space never hurt anybody." Anje agreed, climbing into the cupola, "Or in my case a lot of extra space."

Fernando got into his seat as gunner and looked through his sight. He couldn't wait to find a Tiger and blow it to bits! He would show those nay sayers. If there was one thing he could do and do exceptionally well it was shoot.

Mona, not averse to the idea of cheating, asked the computer to assist her with the controls, first by highlighting how to start the tank, then she engaged the tutorial mode for how to keep the engine running while speed and direction were being altered. It wasn't as easy for her as flying a shuttle. "If you need me to stop to take aim, just shout!" she called up into the turret.

"Just don't stop for too long." Anje instructed, "If we stop too long to aim that gives the Germans time to aim at us. We do not want a blast from that eighty eight...."

In the Lady Aberdeen Gallia and company were gearing up for the mission themselves; she hoped that the change in positions didn't have an adverse effect on their play, though she didn't figure it would, "Alright, people, keep your eyes peeled, there's gonna be Tigers prowlin' about."

Fernando's voice floated down to Mona, "If the need arises for us to stop I will be sure to let you know my Orion beauty." He was already scoping out the surrounding countryside.

Anje giggled and smiled, that Fernando was incorrigible and irrepressible, even if she was sure he was barking up the wrong tree, ~Of course, you hadn't ever been with a man, either, Anje...~ She reminded herself, saying aloud, "He's like a silk scarf, Mona, be careful."

"That's cute", Anya grinned at Liorga. "The Vulcan cautioning the Orion about how to deal with a human male." She didn't expect Mona to hear over the noise of the other tank's engine, and she didn't. Climbing into the Sherman's turret, Anya tried to get comfortable, which wasn't exactly easy. "Definitely better being short in this. No wonder the officers enjoy tanking so much", she quipped.

"Can't disagree there." Liorga replied, the idea of anyone warning an Orion about a guy; it is to laugh...

"Okay, I'm going to turn off listening in on the other crew", Anya smirked. "It's not fair. Can we start?"

"Right." Gallia nodded, "Let's do this."

Fernando called to Anje, "My Vulcan rose, we should get going. Daylight is burning and shooting Tigers is best done during the day."

"Right." Anje nodded, "Roll out!"

Across the way Gallia watched as the tanks, both theirs and computer generated platoon mates, began to roll towards their destination, "All right, everybody keep your eyes open. We're gonna be runnin' inta Tigers for sure, probably some Panthers as well., we should also expect enemy infantry with Panzerfausts, maybe the odd Panzerschreck..."

"What do you want in the pipe, Gallia?" Sami asked.

"We'll probably see tanks first, so load AP." Gallia ordered, turning to Anya, "If they send infantry at us, rip 'em open with that Emma G."

"I've got target lock!" Anya announced. "How long until it's fair to open fire?"

Target lock? Gallia wondered, she didn't see any enemies, but she trusted Anya, "When ya see 'em, blast 'em!"

"Good!" Anya grinned, then let off a shot right at that T-34 the other team was running, smack bang in the rear. "They should have got to cover, and not out ahead of us." She giggled.

"Uh, that wasnae quite what we were lookin' ta do, Anya darlin'." Gallia sighed through a peal of laughter, "But, one hell of a shot ya are!"

"Hell yes!" Sami quickly agreed, wanting Anya to know she was on her side, even in error.

Inside Mamacita was pure chaos, "What the hell just happened?" Anje muttered, pushing herself up off of the deck, "Who shot us?"

"Uh, yeah, about that..." Gallia's voice crackled over the radio, "Seems there was a bit a' that friendly fire, my gunner apparently didnae understand the rules of the game.... Sorry. Ya okay over there?"

Anya giggled. She had understood alright, but this was just too much fun.

"Yeah, I think so." Anje replied, turning to Fernando and Mona, "You two okay?"

"My ears are ringing, and I vow revenge", Mona replied. "But yes, we're okay in here."

"Okay, I think we can resume, just need a couple minutes break." Anje suggested, "Then we'll go for a cooperative effort, I think. No more shooting at each other?"

"I think we can arrange that." Gallia said over the radio, stifling a laugh.

The normally calm and laid back Fernando was swearing up a storm in Spanish. The Spaniard was mad! He finally sputtered out a few words in English, "Turn the turret! I'll give them something to remember!." He vowed to pay Anya back for her dirty trick.

"Fernando, sweetie, you're the gunner." Anje reminded him, "You'd be the one to turn the turret." ~I really hope he doesn't do what I think he's going to do....~ She thought, then realized, ~Yeah, he's totally going to....~

"Evasive manoeuvres!" Anya shouted when she saw the turret turning in their direction. "They're preparing to return fire." The benefit of expecting it, they had time to respond.

Liorga immediately threw the Lady Aberdeen in reverse, backing away as quickly as they could. That being said, evasive maneuvers weren't exactly a specialty of tanks.

Fernando growled and said something in Spanish and turned the turret. He centered, then corrected and led the other tank. Once he was sure of the range. He fired. "Take that!" He yelled as the round bounced off the side of the Lady Aberdeen. "Remember who you are shooting at!"

The 85 millimeter round didn't penetrate, but it was more than enough to irk Gallia, "That bugger!" She snarled, then calmed herself, remembering Anya's friendly fire accident had sparked this thing, "Okay." She said over the radio, "Everybody got it outta your systems now? We're gonna take five and reboot."

"Wonderful idea." Anje agreed, turning to Fernando and silently laughing; he'd made their point adequately.

Fernando smiled at Anje. "No one shoots at us. Especially not friends." He fumed though his temper was rapidly deflating and a tiny grin graced his face.

"I promise, I'll behave now", Anya said. Behave well or badly? She didn't say. But she'd behave, either way.

Gallia threw her head back and laughed, as did the others, it seemed Anya wasn't confused at all, "Well, I guess that'll do."

In Mamacita, Fernando was also making himself a promise. *That's twice Anya has shot at me, there won't be a third time."

A couple of minutes later they were rebooted and rolling again, heading straight into the teeth of the Sixth Panzer Army, "All right, we're gonna be gettin' heavy resistance." Gallia informed her crew, "Sixth Panzer ain't what it used to be at this point, but it certainly isnae somethin' to sneeze at."

"Right." Liorga nodded, giving the tank a little extra juice, wanting to hit and run as best as they could.

Inside Mamacita, Fernando was looking through the gunsight, He already had a AP rounded loaded and was itching to draw first blood in this duel with Tigers. As they rolled on, Fernando spotted something. He spoke on the internal com to Anje and Mona. "Movement at 3 o'clock. Tigers!"

From the other tank, Anya spotted a more troublesome opponent by the muzzle flash. "Something's hiding in that bush, and it missed us by just a foot." She was already preparing to return fire at the unseen opponent but, being a good girl now, waited for the order.

"Some sorta artillery piece." Gallia groaned, "Feed 'em eight centimetres, would ya, Anya?" She grabbed the radio and hailed Mamacita, "Oh, Captain, would ya mind takin' out that Tiger?"

"Right!" Anje replied, turning to Fernando and Mona, "Fernando, get ready for a shot, Mona, the Tiger's only got one weak point and that's its ass! Can you get us in position?"

"I can certainly try", Mona said. She wondered how far they'd get, without support by infantry, and with more tanks around.

"I haven't got eight centimetres", Anya said, not knowing what Gallia meant. It was the round number for the calibre of the main gun, 7.62 centimetres, or three inches in those outdated measurements which Anya had only heard of in history class. But she fired off a shell in the general direction and a StuG III started smoking, burning away the bush along with itself.

Fernando's voice floated up to Anje, "I'm ready." He replied, as he rechecked the range. His finger around the firing control. "Just waiting to get into position."

"Mona, let me know as soon as you can see the rear!" Anje ordered, "Fernando, as soon as she says she has a shot, you take it!"

"Never fear my Vulcan moonbeam, I am ready." Fernando assured her.

Mona looked up for a moment. "I can see your rear up close and personal", she told Anje, then focused back on the driving. "I'll try to get in behind those bushes, and not knock over a tree. But the engine isn't quiet, prepare for trouble." She drove along. She couldn't see the Tiger from her position, Fernando would be the first to spot it.

The T-34 rumbled along, chewing up bushes and knocking over or aside small trees. Then there! In an opening was the backside of the Tiger but it had heard them and was swinging it's turret around. Fernando didn't wait. He fired and the AP shell tore into the Tiger, blasting it to pieces.

"What our armies need is proper infantry support", Mona remarked. "Sheer folly sending out armour without, into these thickets." But it was fun, she had to admit to herself.

"Lets go find some more!" Fernando yelled from the turret.

"Should we follow them?" Anya asked. "They're going to rack up a score in our absence."

"No worries about that." Gallia stated, looking into the periscope and seeing three Tigers coming across a bridge ahead, "Sami, load me up an HE shell in the 17 pounder. Anya, drop it on that bridge, would ya?"

"Then how are we going to get across?" Anya wondered. "Or can this tank swim as well?"

"Well, seein' as that way is right inta the teeth o' the German advance, I didnae plan to go that way anyhow." Gallia replied, "We've got a place to cross about three clicks that way, give us their left side."

Anya nodded and, now that the shell was loaded, she fired. Her aim, despite not having fought in this vehicle for long, was good enough to hit the bridge, and while it did not collapse, there was structural damage that made it impassable for armoured vehicles.

That moment, a new threat came up from out of the river. Yellow, with orange bills and tracks, a squadron of armoured ducks rolled up from the riverbed, firing from twin guns hidden in the eyes. Shells rained down everywhere, and the radio sets in both allied tanks rang out with Estelle's voice. "You're really ducked now!" accompanied by maniacal laughter. "There's no slaughter without laughter, and you've slaughtered enough."

"Your bestie is a lunatic." Liorga laughed to Gallia, "Completely nuts."

"She's your wifey, ay!" Gallia replied, unable to fight her laughter.

"Why I know she's nuts." Liorga shrugged.

In Mamacita Anje just burst out laughing, "That woman is ducked in the head."

Mona just backed the tank off, she didn't want another ringing in the head like from that first shell impact.

"So that's the cause of those malfunctions", Anya concluded.

Fernando shook his head. Fun was fun but this was plain silliness. He said nothing, just rotated the turret and sent a shell into the ducks. "Now we have roasted duck." He said to anyone listening.

"And that's what's for dinner", Estelle said over the intercom. "You're all invited to join me in my quarters. It'll be tight and cosy, but I promise the food is good." She had learnt how to prepare duck in the Chinese way.

"Ya know, I could use a good meal." Anje shrugged, "And good duck is one of my favorites."

"Works for me." Gallia agreed, knowing there was no real point to fighting the ducks, especially not if she could be eating one.

Fernando listened to the friendly banter between the women and felt out of place. The third wheel of a bike. He didn't say anything but he wouldn't join them for dinner. It was one thing to part in a holoprogram it was something else to intrude on the special time and bond that the women shared.