Bad Dreams, Again...

Posted on Mon Nov 21st, 2022 @ 10:58am by Captain Gary Taylor & Lieutenant Commander Aurelia Taylor & Commander Arrianna Salannis an Vantar

Mission: MISSION 0 - History Speaks
Timeline: Sometime after Telling Arri
2043 words - 4.1 OF Standard Post Measure

Arrianna bolted out of her bed. "JOSIE!!!!" She breathed rapidly almost out of breath from struggling with her bed spread. Maybe the Captain was right. She was still having the nightmares. But she simply wished she could talk with her. Just once.

Josie had been there longer than she had.. And she wasn't the one traumatized by this. Arri sighed.. "Josie does deserve someone stronger than me." She said with resignation as she tapped her combadge. "Gary... Aurelia.. "

Gary was jolted awake by Arri's call, He was instantly awake. He tapped his combadge lying on the bedside table, "What's wrong Arri?" He questioned.

"Never mind... it was... another dream." Arri admitted. "Now I have the ones where I loose her again."

"No, too late to say never mind Arri, I'm awake. Make the short trip to our quarters and we'll have some coffee and talk." Gary replied as he got out of bed to change out of his pjs.

Arrianna put on a silk robe and left for Gary's quarters. When she arrived she pushed the door chime.

hearing the chime, Gary opened the door; he was dressed in jeans and a pullover shirt. "Come on in Arri, coffee is brewing."

Arri entered. "I was back in that ascendants damned torture room. With him there. Ascendants dammit."

"Him being Michael Bishop, I take it." Gary stated.

"Some nights I just feel his pain all over again. I wake up in sweat." Arrianna noted. "I can almost feel the incredible pain. I called you because Lia might know this... feeling..."

"She might." Gary agreed. "However, you need to read my file. I know all about pain and being tortured. You didn't corner the market Arri. What I would like to know, is how did Bishop get such a hold on you even now months after you were rescued."

"It was not only excruciating pain.. It was psychological. Combined with drugs and manipulations. He threatened to show me in such a humiliating state to the crew. Then I was manipulated with images of her.. convincing me to give in. At that stage, it was nearly impossible to rationalize.. I wanted the pain to end."

Gary nodded in understanding. "He pushed all your buttons, playing on your pride not to been like you were. He manipulated you with Josie and then he pumped you full of drugs to make you more susceptible to his conditioning."

Lia had been laying in bed listening to Arri and Gary talk, she now slowly arose grabbed her Yukata dressed and entered. "Arri, the more you try and push those experiences into your subconscious the more they're going to escape back in to your consciousness." She grabbed a cold milk from the replicator and sat beside Gary, "Those memories are the part of you which surrendered to Bishop, but they're are also the memories which can help you the most." Lia glanced towards her husband, and took a deep breath. "When the MU Lia first got her hands on me, she expected me to react in a certain way. The thing is I didn't, memories of what my Father then the Romulans had done to me prepared me. You'll never forget what happened, but you will learn to use it when you have to."

As Lia finished, Gary spoke. "Arri, what Lia says is correct. turn this horror into a strength you can use. In a way Bishop is still controlling you, your life, your thoughts and actions. You are stronger than that Arri, your people defeated the Borg, you can defeat Michael Bishop. We're here to help you Arri, to get you back to where you want to be. Where you and Josie can be happy together. That is what you want correct?" He questioned knowing that was precisely what Arri wanted a life with her beloved Josie. He put his coffee cup down. "Time to put your big girl panties on Arri and beat this bastard.''

"I want my life BACK." Arrianna shouted. "I WANT TO BE HAPPY AGAIN." She was shouting it out. "But most importantly.. I WANT TO tell Micheal BISHOP. He will never break me and Josie again. I've been remade stronger. I am Stronger now."

Gary looked to Lia and then back to Arri. "Get it out Arri. Get it all out. No holding back." He encouraged her.

"I want Josie to take everything back from him. Everything!!!" Arri noted. "I'm done running from him! I fought for Phoenix's children with Aurelia." Arri noted. "I am done crying!!!!!!"

"Say it like you mean it Arri. Scream it to the heavens." Gary answered.

"YOU BETTER NOT COME AROUND ME AGAIN!!!" She shouted. "Or I will send you to the humans afterlife right next to Captain Taylor." Arri noted. "AND ACCORDING TO MY KNOWLEDGE OF HUMAN RELGIOUS AFTERLIFE PURGATORIES!!!! You're going right next to him!!!" Arri noted. "Is that enough?"

"You tell me Arri. How do you feel? Did you believe what you just said? That's the key. Shouting it doesn't mean a thing unless you mean it. Did you mean it?" Gary repeated.

"I mean it, I've had enough of him." Arri noted. "I hope Micheal Bishop stays a sufficient distance away from us.. Or I'll let Phoenix kill him."

"Now you're talking Arri and thinking." Gary said with approval. "I don't think you'll ever have to worry about Michael Bishop again."

As Arri shouted her lungs out, Lia remembered how Bashir had helped her. He'd put her in a situation where she had to make a choice, move forward or remain and be abused for the rest of her life. "Arri, never forget what Bishop did. Never forget how you survived, and use it to move forward. Remember that, keep moving forward or you risk being hurt like that again." She held out her hand and took Arri's hand, "Your more than Bishop said you were, your more than what you seem to be. And your not alone, the hurt will never go away but in time you will control it. I know, I still carry my hurt, my shame. I will forever remember being called a `Kinky Doll'. But now I use that to defend myself, because I never want to be one ever again."

"Arri." Gary said firmly but not unkindly. "Only you can make this happen. Savar, Alicia, Lia and I can support and give encouragement but only you can defeat Bishop's hold over you. Only you have the strength to defeat him. Stand up, dig deep and show Bishop just how strong and tough you are."

"I know what to do." She noted. "I need to tell him how he failed.. It will be hard to do so.. But I need to say it."

"You're going to write Bishop a letter?" Gary questioned. "Arri, he'll never receive it. How do you intend for him to read it? Let alone get it?" I think you are better off writing a letter and getting your feelings and thoughts out and on paper."

"Oh he'll get it eventually." Arrianna mentioned. "It is time I told him that if we ever cross paths again. I will end him. He will not permit himself to be captured. But in a way, he is a slave. One without chains." Arrianna noted. "The line between slave and slaver is thin."

"Perhaps he will." Gary admitted. "You may be right in saying he won't permit himself to be captured Arri and he'll die but somehow I think he'd have an escape plan. He doesn't have a thug mentality. He's smart, he broke Cragen's conditioning on Josie."

"What he did to me and my Josie was beyond the pale. As humans say. But I cannot dismiss the possiblity that this was what Cragen made him into." Arri noted. "As you and Lia know.. My people were once so savage. Mentioning our race's name was terror in and of itself." Arri noted. "You saw the Terran Empire that one time when they captured us? Well you saw an ancient Alindari. Where plots and treachery prevailed. We don't know how long we were so savage, but we do know it was centuries... Before a betrayal lead our first empress to survive the Alin deserts, and the suns burned her cruelty away." Arri noted.

"All true Arri. Bishop may be a creation of Cragen but the fact remains he's smart. Don't underestimate him." Gary replied simply.

Listening to the back and forth between Arri and Gary, Lia just nodded as points were made. "If your Empress had her cruelty burned away, couldn't you have your pain used as a shield to protect you from further harm? It wouldn't be easy, but then this universe doesn't give away free rides."

"Good point Lia." Gary said as he glanced at Arri. "What about that Arri? You could do that." He pointed out.

"Such a journey of self-discovery nearly killed young Tirielle Althir." Arrianna noted. "I will need to be tested... and rigorously rebuilt." Arri noted. "Do I step in the desert to have my old self removed? Do I face who I was and allow myself to be remade?"

Gary looked at Lia and then to Arri. "I think anything you do starts with you Arri. That you are honest with yourself, and you start there and go forward. You don't have to be remade. What do you want Arri? Besides you being reunited with Josie and that may or not happen, Josie has a say in this as well. So, what do you want if she decides she doesn't want to be with you? You need a plan."

Arrianna sighed. "They replaced me on the bridge. It feels like Starfleet punished me for allowing myself to be enslaved."

"Arri, you were gone for months. Starfleet need someone to fill your position. It wasn't personal. Now you are back and when you are cleared for duty, you will be back on the bridge." Gary pointed out.

"Does Phoenix hate me now. Am I that weak in her eyes. That much of a child?" Arri noted. "This is not how I wanted it to be."

"Arri, how can you even say and think something like that about Phoenix? In no way does she see you as weak or as a child." Gary replied quickly and decisively.

She began smiling. "Thank you for being there for me. I have doubts gnawing away at me. Now I feel as if I can push forward."

"Arri, you can do this. We are all here for you and will help and support you anyway we can.'' Gary told her.

"I need your and Phoenix's help to tell her. I love her with all .my heart."

Moving forward, Lia took Arri's hand. "Listen Arri, nobody goes through what you went through and exits the other side unaffected. I was and am affected every day by what the Romulans and the MU monsters did to me, I carry my shame every day. But how you learn and choose how to change is in your own hands." She turned to look at Gary, "There stands the person who in his own way assisted me, he held my hand and guided me when I began my self-destruction. You have us if you want us, Phoenix doesn't hate you nobody hates you for what happened." She returned her gaze back to Arri, "YOU will tell Phoenix you love her, because you'll have the strength within you. And you will walk tall once again on the bridge, because that's where you belong."

Arri embraced Lia. "I cannot get her back alone.... I cannot get everything back alone."

"You won't be alone, if you'll have me. I'll walk beside you, and I'm sure Gary would also be willing to walk along with you as well." Lia simply stood and waited for Arri to respond.

"You've never been alone Arri," Gary stated. "It has just taken you awhile to see that and of course I'll walk alongside you and support you anyway I can just as Lia will."

Arri embraced Gary too. "Thank you for not giving up on me."

"Everything is going to be alright Arri." Gary told his friend as he returned her hug.