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"A Promise"

Posted on Wed May 24th, 2023 @ 2:04am by Captain Samuel Woolheater & Consul Andrinn Orin

Mission: Season 6: Episode 2: Survival
Location: Planetside - Orin's tent - Late
Timeline: MD04 - LATE
3631 words - 7.3 OF Standard Post Measure

[ON:]

It was late. Most people had already gone to bed. Captain Woolheater walked as quietly and carefully as he could between the tents of the sleeping occupants. He was heading for Andrinn’s tent. His duty shift had been over for an hour. He had gotten himself cleaned up and didn’t have to report for duty until 1100 hours tomorrow. It was a welcome break from the 0400 call times he had gotten the past four days. Sam saw that there was a low light still on inside the tent and he wondered if Andrinn was still up? He approached the tent softly and then rapped his knuckles on his right hand against the pole in the form of a knock before entering the tent.

He unzipped the outer layer and then the inner layer and stepped inside. “Hey?!” he said as he turned and closed the liners and then zipped them shut again. Andrinn was seated close to the small space heater. It was on low, and he was seated on a shipping crate. Wrapped in a blanket. Andrinn didn’t reply at first. Sam noticed that but didn’t say anything. He looked at him while he took off his combat armor. Setting the chest plate down securely. Now that the body armor was removed he took a closer look. It appeared to him that Andrinn had been waiting and thinking. For how long Sam did not know. He looked at Andrinn and pulled another crate up close to the space heater and sat down next to him. He warmed his hands and looked over at Andy. Sam was wondering if he had done something that made Andrinn mad? Maybe it’s because he was an hour late? He said again, “Hi?” And looked at him wondering what, if anything, was wrong.

Andrinn tried to hide the fact that he had tears in his eyes, not wanting to show weakness or fear. He had been one of the people who had to keep it all together for the rest of the crew and especially for Sam. Andrinn knew Sam and he knew that Sam had such a beautiful soul that Andrinn didn't want to crush or show outward fear for. Andrinn just wiped away the few tears that he had on his face and finally looked up at Sam and replied in such a whisper that it was almost inaudible, "Hey."

Andrinn had been thinking about the various people in his life that he lost, including former shipmates. He had seen so much death and destruction that he forgot how much it meant to truly be...human? As the humans would call it. Andrinn had been meaning to go see the counselor, but was worried that if Sam saw him go, he might think that Andrinn was somehow weak. But, Andrinn knew he would eventually need to go talk to the counselors.

Sam saw the tears being wiped away. He knew that something had happened. He immediately scooted closer. News of what had happened to Ensign Miraj had quietly spread around - much to the chagrin of everyone trying to keep the investigation quiet - and Sam's first thought was that Andrinn had been hurt. "Andrinn? Hey? What's wrong? Are you hurt? Are you injured?" Sam was concerned and worried and he looked Andrinn over and listened.

Andrinn just laid his head on Sam's shoulder and didn't say anything for a little bit. Andrinn didn't want anyone to know that he had any sort of emotions on the outside. People could use that in a diplomatic situation against Andrinn or the Federation itself. But, in this moment, Andrinn was emotionally exhausted and it caused a bit of physical exhaustion.

Sam put his arms around Andrin and held him. His embrace was strong, comforting and warm. His body warmth from the suit was still present. He was like a giant hot water bottle.

Andrinn just kept his head on Sam's shoulder for a moment, looking into the void before he finally replied, "I've just been in my head recently. Thinking about the past and all the shit I've been through over the years and such."

Sam listened and held Andrinn close. His breathing was slow and calming. His embrace was full of love and concern. He said softly in his baritone voice, "You are a private kind of guy. You always think of others ahead of yourself. You put other people's needs ahead of your own. Sometimes you give away too much. But, that's what I love about you. Your big heart." Sam put his head next to Andrinn's and just was contented to "be" present with him.

Andrinn just sat there and listened to Sam for a moment, not sure what to say or how to respond to what he said. He almost wished that he took everything that the counselors said to heart, but Andrinn was unsure of himself for once. He just looked at Sam for a moment, hoping that something would've been said before too long to break the silence.

After a moment, Samuel said, "Andy? Promise me something? Promise me not to hide yourself when you're in pain, it's unfair that we laughed together but you cried alone."

Andrinn just waited for a moment before finally whispering, "I'm scared. I'm afraid of the silence."

Sam nodded and asked quietly and tenderly, "What does the silence mean for you? Why are you afraid?"

When there was no answer he looked at Andrinn and said, "Hey? Don't lock me out? I want to know. I care about you and I can see you're hurting. Tell me how you are hurting? What are you afraid of in silence?"

Andrinn just buried his face in Sam's chest, wanting to get lost in the silence for once. But, he knew better because that's what was causing his pain. Andrinn was tired of blocking people out of his life and not telling them what was going on.

"Well, you do know that I'm an old man, right? I'm over 300 years old. When I was younger, I dated a man and he was my first love. However, I was an outcast, alongside my entire family. When he passed away tragically, I couldn't talk to anyone because all the therapists on Trill didn't even want to talk to me. I was alone and while being alone, it was incredibly silent. I only had my family to talk to, but they never could understand what it was like for me. So, it was such an experience for me as a young man. I remained silent for quite some time. This whole experience on the Elysium has caused me to think back on those moments as a young man," Andrinn replied, his face still buried a bit in Sam's chest, tears slowly streaming down his face.

Sam held on to him and tenderly stroked Andrinn's hand as Andrinn told him what was going on. He leaned back against his armor so he wouldn't slide and gathered Andrinn into his arms and just held him. Andrinn had his back to Sam and Sam wrapped him in an embrace and was quiet. He arms around Andrinn in a protective embrace and he listened. After a moment he said, "Tears are the safety valve of the heart when too much pressure is laid on it. I do know you are over 300 years old. You've gotten better and btter as you age. Just like a fine wine. With his hands he rubbed Andrinns arms and then gave him a shoulder and neck massage. As he did so, he encouraged him to tell him more. There were times when, somehow, Sam knew not to push. He just listened and waited. As if they had all the time in the world. His fingers were good at getting the knots of out Andrinn's neck. Woolheater, how appropriate. He was as warm and thick as a 'wool heater'. His touch was soothing and authentic. His baritone voice was like warm water. Soothing and refreshing and relaxing. There was not a hint of anxiousness or trouble in it. And when he wrapped his muscled arms around Andrinn and kissed him first on the ear and then the cheek. And then whispering in his ear, ..."I love you"... it was solid.

"I always knew that I was going to outlive the people that I came to love. But, I never knew that someone that I cared for would be taken so soon from me, especially someone as young as we were. I think that's why I became so distressed lately. When....when I saw you," Andrinn said, tugging gently at Sam's under armor, looking up into Sam's eye with another tear coming down his face. He managed to finally finish his sentence when he said, "When I saw you on the table after you stumbled back into camp lately, I just thought back to when I was that young man and how I couldn't do anything to help. I just felt beyond helpless and I wanted to make sure that you were okay, even if it was by just warming you up a little bit. It just reminded me that I wasn't there to help then and how I should've been there to help you this time."

"Hey....sshhhh.....c'mon now. Nothing happened. And you are doing more than your fair share around here. I'm fine. It's sweet that you are worried about me. I got a little bit frozen; that's all. And all the while what kept me going was you. I couldn't wait to be back by your side and in your arms. When I was lonely, I thought of you. And the thought kept me warm. I'm not going anywhere." He smiled back at him, "OK? We're not gonna die on this frozen rock. We're going to live. And we will enjoy a hot bath and a sauna as high as we can set the thermals." He kissed him. "I'm sorry that you were in such pain. I'll...I'll do better next time."

Sam rubbed Andrinn's temples and his forehead to release the tension. And he listened. He was just...present. Present in every way that mattered. And he said, "You never forget, you never 'get over' your first love. Sure, there are others. And you love them truly as well. But, ah....the very first love of your life. No one is like that person. Tell you a story? I had a crush on this girl. Jaqueline Langford is her name. And she didn't even notice me. Till, one day, I get up the courage to ask her out on a date. And she says "Yes". I was so happy. Anyway. We go on a date and it was like...dating your sister. She meant everything to me and I was just...nothing...to her. Just one more date in a long chain of guys. She was beautiful. The most beautiful person I had ever seen and I was sure I'd never see anyone as good as her. Ever. In my whole life...y'know? Of course I was wrong. She had her eye on this other guy. Black hair, pointy ears, a Vulcan lady killer. The date ended. I got a handshake. And that was it. I came home and just cried. I did not know that the heart could hurt that much. And it hurt...lemme tell ya. My dad sees me crying and demands to know why. And normally, you knew that you were going to get whacked. On the head across the face. But the old man surprises me. I tell him about my date and what happened. He says nothing and I know I'm gonna get hit. It never comes. He looks at me and says, "Yeah...hurts don't it." I think that's probably the closest I've ever been to my dad. Anyway, point is Andrinn, saying it another way. Tears are also a telescope bringing us closer to what matters. You matter to me. A lot."

Andrinn just buried his face into the soft, warm under armor that Sam was wearing, not wanting to be anywhere else or with anyone else. He held Andrinn. His fingers lightly tracing Andrinn's ear. He just listened and didn't push. After a moment he asked, "Tell me more about this person? What was his name?"

"Prom.....promise you won't get mad and leave me if I talked about him?" Andrinn said through sniffles, wiping away some of the fresh tears that felt down his face.

"I promise. You're three-hundred years old remember?" Sam said.

"Oka.....okay.....Well, his name was Tobin and he was one of the local farmer's sons. We were both around the same age and I think we were in the same grade level in high school. He had just transferred into the school because it was a more centralized High School. He was charming, sweet, didn't push anything because he knew that I was the outcast on the planet because of how my parents met. When we went to our first school dance together, we went as friends and wore matching suits like goofballs. That's where I had my first official dance with him and we started dating afterwards. We had to date secretly at first because of the stupid stuff that was placed on my family for who we are. We dated from Freshmen year through our senior, when....when...." Andrinn said, before he started to hyperventilate.

Andrinn started to turn pale and his breathing was shallow and fast. His skin was cold and his hands were cold. "Slow down.....hey...hey...hey....easy does it. Slow it down....Andy? C'mon man....don't have a heart attack. Don't leave me now Andy. I'm.....Andrinn! I'm getting a medic. Hold on.....MED!"

Andrinn put his hand back on Sam's chest on top of his undershirt, before he replied back to Sam, "No, no....don't call the doctors. They've got a lot on their minds right now. I was just having a flashback to my previous host, Ranul. Both Ranul and Tobin died in fiery accidents. Tobin died in a shuttle accident, while Ranul died from injures sustained from a terrorist bombing on the symbiosis commission's headquarters. I was just connected to some really strong feelings from his memories. I'll be fine....promise."

Sam searched his face. His warm breath causing steam in the air of the tent. Sam took both of Andrinn's hands in his and he warmed them by rubbing them in his. "Are you sure you're OK? That is one heck of a memory." He looked into Andy's eyes before hugging him close, "You sure?"

"Yeah, I promise that I'll be fine. I've just had a lot of memories that have surfaced over the last few days since the whole accident on the Elysium. I'm sorry that I scared you. I'm....just a very private person and that's why I hate going to see counselors. But, I might need to go and talk to one in the morning after all of that. What do you think?" Andrinn said, trying to keep himself a bit calm.

Sam said, "Well...I know you're a private person. And I know you are that way for a good reason. You've been hurt. So, I understand. But, I think going to see one of the counselors would help. I think talking about what happened helps. Get it out of your mind, off your chest and externalize it. You can tell me anything you want and I'll listen. But, somone trained in...counselor...shit...would probably be better. Yeah?" Sam was encouraging and supportive.

Andrinn nodded his head and said, "Okay, I'll go first thing in the morning. What time do you have to be on duty in the morning? I'd like for you to come and support me, if...that's okay? Even if it's not first thing in the morning, we can go whenever you're off tomorrow or over the next few days."

Sam nodded, "I have watch duty at 1200 hours tomorrow. The morning will be just fine. Whenever they can see you." Sam rubbed Andrinn's back to help him relax. He rested his head against Andrinn's. "We'll get through this Andy. I know we will."

Andrinn just sat there in silence for a moment before saying anything else. He wasn't sure what to say exactly. He just took Sam's hand and wrapped it around him and laid it on his waist, approximately where Orin laid within Andrinn himself. When he was finally able to finally speak again, Andrinn whispered, "Well, did I ever tell you about all of my previous hosts?"

Patting the sleeping bags and blankets and drawing him closer and from the floor to the bed, he laid next to him and put his hand back on Orin before answering, "I only know that you had two or three previous hosts. I figured one day, you'd tell me about them." He smiled, "Today is that day?"

"I only had about two previous hosts. Ranul was the one that came before me, but there was also a man named Jarin Orin, who was the first host. I'm only the third, but I've had such a long life that I should be the fifth or sixth host. Sometimes, I wonder if I'm being selfish and holding the Orin symbiant hostage. Is that why I'm sad?" Orin said as he climbed into the bed with Sam, listening to his own breathing for a moment to help ground himself. He just looked at Sam and smiled with a small smile forming on his face.

He looked back at Andrinn and grinned, "You? Selfish? C'mon. Give yourself a break. You're also El-Aurian and Trill. I think....there a reason that you have such a long....life-span. You have something we short-life span creatures don't get often. Perspective."

"It's weird, you know? Something I've never told anyone outside of Trill society is that I've got to go back to the Trill homeworld around every century after my joining to have the little guy taken out of me for a little bit. He joins the pool of other symbiants to pretty much let out some steam because he had been joined with me for so long. Again, with most hosts, they live to be around 100 years old or so. So, it's interesting when I wake up from the experience. Also, before you ask, it's only for a little bit of time, so it doesn't do any major harm to me. There's....a lot to me that people don't realize," Andrinn said before hugging Sam and just burying his face in Sam's shoulder.

He did his best to comfort him and spoke soothingly to him. "This whole ordeal has been stressful for everybody. And because you are a member of the senior staff, you have to be strong. You have to project calm when you don't feel calm. Strength when you feel afraid. You do it very well. You're doing the best that you can keeping everyone together and working together. It'll take time. You should give yourself some time to reflect too." As he spoke he lightly caressed Andrinn as comfortingly as he could. He felt along his belly for the symbiant and stroked his hands over the area as well. Soothingly and calmly.

"I'll stand watch OK? You sleep. I'll stay awake and watch over the tent. Watch over you. If anything happens, I'll wake you. Get some rest. Let someone else carry the load for a bit huh?"

Andrinn grabbed Sam's arm before he could get out of the tent and said, "Wait. Rest with me for a little bit. There are security personnel out there right now guarding all of the encampments, but there's only one of you. Guard me while I sleep, okay? That's how you can carry some of the load right now, okay?"

He smiled back, "Okay" and went back to the side of the bed. "You're the boss" and he took off his shoes and pants and got into bed with Andrinn. Pulling the sleeping bag closer and sharing body heat, Sam had his arm wrapped around Andrinn as the "spooned" together in the sleeping bag.

=======

It was sometime later when Samuel was about to drop off when he felt the symbiant inside Andinn's belly stir. And he felt Andrinn's body tense up. Sam listened to Andrinn's breathing get more shallow and faster. Now, Andrinn was a beefy, muscular guy and Sam knew that Andy was strong. He didn't want to wake him; Andy's subconcious needed to deal with his feelings. Sam eased up and didn't hold Andrinn too tightly, he spoke softly and said, ".....I'm here for you Andy.....you're OK bud.....let it out.....I'm here" he said as Andrinn was having a bad dream. Sam did not want to startle Andrinn and end up with a bloody nose. He put his hand back on the Orin symbiont and addressed Orin, "SSShhhhh......Orin......this is Sam. I got you bud......Andrinn and I....we got you......"

Eventually, the minutes seemed like hours before the symbiant calmed down. Andrinn during this time acted as if he were having a prolonged bad dream. Sam let him have that bad dream. The rest of the early morning passed without incident. And before too long it was morning again.

"Promise me not to hide yourself when you're in pain, it's unfair that we laughed together but you cried alone." It seemed to Sam that both Orin and Andrinn had pasts that niether one wanted to share.


[OFF:]

Consul Andrinn Orin
(signed off by Woolheater)

&

Captain Samuel Woolheater
SFMC - 1st Platoon CO

 

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Comments (2)

By Lieutenant J'airesh Mora-Heath on Fri May 26th, 2023 @ 9:12am

Another truly moving and well written post, Tommy. Nice work my friend. Joolsx

By Lieutenant J'airesh Mora-Heath on Fri May 26th, 2023 @ 9:23am

sorry.... and Jonathan too of course. jx